Erin Nicole's Blog

Where Erin Talks about whatever she wants to whenever she wants to.

My Real Life — A Story about Food Addiction.

Hey guys!

So it has been a while since I finally admitted to myself that I am addicted to food and I’ve been dealing with it but I’m finally ready to let the world know that this is a real thing. Whether you go through it just during hard times or if you deal with it every day of your life, like me. It is a struggle. It is similar in some ways to being addicted to anything else while also different because you can’t just stop eating. It is impossible.

I’m not currently seeing anyone about this as I doubt they would be able to help me. I need to be able to help me before anyone else can help me. I want to help myself with this but it is a daily struggle. Hourly struggle. Every minute struggle. It sucks and I would not wish this on my worst enemy… (okay maybe I might…)

Anyway, I have certain foods that set me off that when I think about them or hear their names I just have to have them…. Like an addict. They are as follows, in no order:

  • Cake
  • Ice Cream
  • Pasta (mainly the picture to the right)
  • Candy –  KitKat’s and M&Ms mainly.
  • Drinks – Sprite/Sierra Mist, Minute Maid Lemonade, sometimes Orange Juice, and rarely Water.
  • Popcorn

It isn’t a long list but it is a list nonetheless. When I think about those topics my mouth starts to water, all I can think about is the food I want and how I am going to make it, when I am going to make it, how it is going to taste and all that kind of stuff. I hate that I am like this and that this has developed into a full fledged addiction and I’m so ashamed of it but I’m not going to deny it anymore.

When I do eat those foods, I over eat. I will it a king size kitkat in a matter of seconds, a sharing size M&Ms in a minute and you get the picture. I inhale it and don’t chew. I hate chewing, one reason why I don’t tend to eat meat. Not only is it OK for me not to eat meat but I hate chewing so it works out. LOL

Anyway, since I inhale it I overheat and eat to the point where I’m so full my stomach hurts. One time I ate so much that I thought I was gonna throw up. I didn’t but that was the most I’ve ever eaten. I really want to cut back but it is hard. I try that whole chewing for 5 minutes and your body will seem fuller faster but I hate chewing so after a minute I give up and swallow.

I know I seem like I’m joking with the “LOLs” but I laugh when I am nervous or talking about anything serious. That’s just how I am.

I’m not posting this for sympathy or words of kindness or help… Like I said, I have to help myself first and that is a battle I am fighting. I am posting this so I can get the word out that it is a real thing and something that people deal with that isn’t easy.

Anyway, I’m not sure what else I could say about it that I haven’t already said. My family has addiction that runs in the family (grandfather was addicted to alcohol and cigarettes). Due to that most of my immediate family is also addicted to food. They cook enough for a family of 10 and we are a family of 5 then in turn overeat. It is an awful cycle that I am now out of now that I am partially out of their house. (explained in an earlier blog)

That is all I really have to say about the subject. If you have any questions, feel free to ask them below. 🙂

Categories: addiction, Blog, challenge, family, life, long blog

2 replies

  1. I feel a lot like you. I honestly have a very similar problem with food that is very similar to what you just described. It’s a comfort item for me. I stress eat which is a huge problem for me which would explain why I have gained so much weight honestly. It is a terrible habit which I should break, but it is so hard honestly! If you need someone to support you along the way let me know! I know I could use it!

  2. Oh Erin! 🙁 That sounds awful. I have never known anyone with food addiction nor do I know what it’s like. I personally have a sugar addiction at times. If you put a bag of candy in front of me, I will eat the whole thing. I just get such enjoyment out of it.

    It’s a shame you eat so fast and that seems to be an issue. Maybe you have tried, but has it been difficult to try and chew, maybe lessening the chance that you’ll reach for more? I know for me that all it takes is a bit of self-control, keep the food away from me and I won’t think about it. It sounds like you have cravings every now and then, I hope you can find little tricks to trick your body and mind into eating healthier or less. I used to treat my candy addiction by snacking on nuts non-stop. It was healthier in the end, I guess.

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